In that moment, my life began to change forever. I never imagined that I would have a complicated pregnancy. After all, my three sons were each delightful pregnancies and easy deliveries. I loved being pregnant;

At 37 I looked forward to having one more child, one more dream to fulfill. I always wanted a little girl to dress in pink ruffles and ribbons. It seemed my dream was about to be shattered, and a nightmare was lurking around the corner.

After we went back to the doctor's office for the second ultrasound and an amniocentesis, my husband and I got on our knees and begged God to give us a healthy child.

Yet we would trust Him, no matter what His will was. We seemed to vacillate between hope and calamity. We were both fearful, yet full of faith.

Two weeks later, we sat in the doctor's office and received the news that our fourth child was, indeed, a girl, and this much-longed for baby had Trisomy 21, commonly known as Down syndrome.

Instead of having 46 chromosomes in each of her cells, she would have 47. During cell division, the two #21 chromosomes do not separate properly. We also learned that our fragile daughter had two congenital heart defects.

Shortly after we received our news, I began experiencing physical complications. Severe panic attacks began to interfere with my sleep at night.

Soon, they would hit hard and strong during the daytime as well. My heart would race out of control, my skin would crawl, my muscles would tense. My body retained fluid that was evident in every joint and feature. I could not breathe or swallow without great effort.

Day by day I resolved to recite Scripture, claiming God's healing on my body. I took charge of my raging thoughts, standing firm on the truths of God's Word. The most significant Scriptures that became my anchor were Proverbs 3:5,6, Jeremiah 29:11, and Psalm 139.

I knew that I must trust the Lord with all my heart, lean not on my own understanding of our situation, acknowledge Him throughout this difficult time, and have confidence that He would surely direct our path.

I looked forward to the fulfillment of the promise of a future that held hope and not despair, blessings and not calamity. I had every confidence that God the creator was carefully and not care-less-ly knitting my unborn baby in my womb.

There was a purpose for her body being formed differently than I had dreamed. God had a great plan for each of our lives before one day was even lived.

The physical toll on my body was exhausting. During my seventh month of pregnancy I was admitted to the hospital. My life was being threatened.

My doctor came in to the room, cleared his throat, and announced, "This pregnancy must be terminated immediately." I had developed congestive heart failure, pulmonary edema, and kidney failure. I was hours from facing eternity. I was close to death.

As my husband and I heard those words, I looked over at my youngest son, Joey, and wondered if I would live to ever hold him again, to hug him, to kiss him, to watch him grow up. Would I give up my life and the children I already had in order to let this unborn baby live?

Would she have to give up her life before she breathed one breath? Would she even survive this premature intrusion of the quiet, silent world of my womb in which she lived?

Four years later, Tess continues to amaze us with her abilities, her incredible charm, and her power to bring people of all ages closer to the Lord.

We also have the privilege of sharing our story with people all around the country, bringing hope for the future to other families. Tess's first name is "Joannah" which means "God's gracious gift."

What a prophetic name! We have received an incredible gift all wrapped up in a beautiful Down syndrome package; and we cherish every day with our precious little girl.

At 9:53 p.m. February 10, 1995, two and one half months before she was due to be born Joannah Tess Fuller arrived by cesarean section. She weighed 2 lbs. 11 oz., and was 15 inches tiny.

After the doctors worked on my heart, I was taken to the Intensive Care unit and would not be conscious for almost three days. My baby was a fighter and doing amazingly well. God saw fit to spare each of our lives, and we would live to love again.

At 18 months of age, the doctors at Riley's Children Hospital in Indianapolis, Indiana, repaired the two heart defects that are so common in children with Down syndrome.

In fact, we were told to our amazement, the repairs were done regularly; and we could rest assured that this procedure was common. We were given every hope that once repaired, our daughter would have a healthy heart.

True to their word, the doctors released Tess, as she is affectionately called, with a clean bill of health after five days' recuperation from open-heart surgery! Thank you Lord!

Nina Fuller is available to speak at churches, banquets and Right to Life events. She introduces Tess to her audience as living proof of God's goodness. You may contact her at: Living Proof Testimonies, PO Box 994, Newburgh, IN 47629

e-mail: [email protected]